"... I do not need those as well... I have to be strong. It is mine alone..." She blinks at his words and just how quickly he goes to add in the the thought. So fast that before she could stop herself, a giggle leaves her. "But it would be true."
At his question, a small sigh leaves her. "For myself yes... For them... I am living."
Mitsuhide shook his head some. "Comparing your experiences to those of others doesn't make sense. It's like comparing an apple to an orange. They both taste different, but that doesn't mean that one is better than the other."
He gave a small sigh. "You cannot live for them if you are not living for yourself. Shutting yourself in is doing them a disservice."
"Even if it is comparing to such fruit, it is what I must do. It is what we Herons do, comfort others even if we may need the comfort. We must be strong for others."
She goes to sigh as well, allowing a few tears to fall from her eyes. "But I must be the perfect Heron, the perfect female."
Mitsuhide gently reached up and caught her tears with a finger, effectively wiping them away. "I can't imagine anyone being effective at comforting others if they themselves refuse such a thing when they need it the most. Taking comfort is not a sign of weakness, little one. It's a sign of being alive."
He places a light kiss at the top of her head. "No one is asking you to be perfect. Especially not here in Avalon. In fact, I think imperfections are what makes someone beautiful. It gives them a very endearing quality."
It felt a little surreal, to see a finger that isn't her own catching her tears and also being comforted like this. "Then you have never met a Heron before, at least none before me." A small sigh. "While it is true, Mitsuhide... This one... This one cannot be selfish and ask of such things."
The kiss on the top of her head and she couldn't help but to let more tears fall. Why was he breaking through her defenses so easily?!
"But... I have to be... I am not allowed... Their deaths. Why am I the only one?"
"You are not being selfish if there is one here who is willing to give comfort to you without being asked." Though he wasn't sure what to think about the Heron culture if it caused Leanne to tear herself down so much. It reminded him of some of the Buddist sects that were again Nobunaga.
"I cannot answer to why you are the only one. I just know that they saved you simply because they loved you. For them, you need to learn to love yourself as well."
She shouldn't accept this comfort. She doesn't deserve such comforts. "But... It is still...." She was losing the willpower to keep the argument up. Numb, her whole being feels numb due to letting nearly everything out. Heron culture was the best culture, she is just trying to overdo it due to guilt.
"But... I don't deserve such a sacrifice or great act of love...."
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At his question, a small sigh leaves her. "For myself yes... For them... I am living."
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He gave a small sigh. "You cannot live for them if you are not living for yourself. Shutting yourself in is doing them a disservice."
SHHHH!!! THIS ISN'T LATE!
She goes to sigh as well, allowing a few tears to fall from her eyes. "But I must be the perfect Heron, the perfect female."
Totes late!
He places a light kiss at the top of her head. "No one is asking you to be perfect. Especially not here in Avalon. In fact, I think imperfections are what makes someone beautiful. It gives them a very endearing quality."
So so totes late!
The kiss on the top of her head and she couldn't help but to let more tears fall. Why was he breaking through her defenses so easily?!
"But... I have to be... I am not allowed... Their deaths. Why am I the only one?"
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"I cannot answer to why you are the only one. I just know that they saved you simply because they loved you. For them, you need to learn to love yourself as well."
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"But... I don't deserve such a sacrifice or great act of love...."