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[damn_kitsune]

Moshi moshi. This is Akechi Mitsuhide. What secrets and schemes you wish to share with me today?

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[song_princess]

She feels his arm tightening around her. It was hard not to when he was already holding her so close. How long has she put her guard down around him? How long ago that his presence made her feel relaxed and comforted? But still... He was a human and was a part of those who destroyed her people and home.

"And I can still see it all happening, whenever I close my eyes." She just speaks softly and quietly. "... I miss them and I do want to be with them.... But..." She goes to shake her head. "Even so... I did not deserve such a sacrifice. Any of my siblings would have made a much better choice than this one."

[damn_kitsune]

"Most trauma like that never fully goes away. It just becomes more bearable." He knew this for a fact not just from his own experiences, but also from what other survivors and victims have told him as well. "Talking about it does help. Especially if it's with someone you trust." He had only confined with his closest vassals. Only they knew what he went through in the past.

He went back to stroking her hair, trying to soothe her more. "Now, now. I just told you to stop insulting their sacrifice by tearing yourself down. You said you were just weaned, so I'm assuming that means you are the youngest? Then it would make sense for them to put some much effort to save you. It was to keep your life from being cut short when it barely just begun. They wanted to give you a chance to live. So live, so that their memory could also continue on living as well."

[song_princess]

"Never goes away..." She just goes to mumble before shaking her head at the other suggestion. "That... It is this one's burden and hers alone. I don't want or need any pity..."

The hair stroking... it really shouldn't be as soothing and comforting as it is. She was about to protest again but stopped as she couldnt will herself to fight against him. "Yes, I was the youngest out of my siblings. I do live... my life is not my own but it is for them... so they would never be forgotten..."

[damn_kitsune]

"It's not pity that you will receive. Most of the time, you will receive sympathy and empathy. You will be surprised how many have also suffered a great loss as well." Then a thought came to mind and he had to quickly add in. "Do not take that as an invite to start comparing your loss to others, and that yours is small compared to others'." He knew how she would tend to bring herself down in order to make her feel unworthy of comfort.

"Are you really living, little one?" he asked. "From the looks of it, you are only existing."

[song_princess]

"... I do not need those as well... I have to be strong. It is mine alone..." She blinks at his words and just how quickly he goes to add in the the thought. So fast that before she could stop herself, a giggle leaves her. "But it would be true."

At his question, a small sigh leaves her. "For myself yes... For them... I am living."

[damn_kitsune]

Mitsuhide shook his head some. "Comparing your experiences to those of others doesn't make sense. It's like comparing an apple to an orange. They both taste different, but that doesn't mean that one is better than the other."

He gave a small sigh. "You cannot live for them if you are not living for yourself. Shutting yourself in is doing them a disservice."

SHHHH!!! THIS ISN'T LATE!

[song_princess]

"Even if it is comparing to such fruit, it is what I must do. It is what we Herons do, comfort others even if we may need the comfort. We must be strong for others."

She goes to sigh as well, allowing a few tears to fall from her eyes. "But I must be the perfect Heron, the perfect female."

Totes late!

[damn_kitsune]

Mitsuhide gently reached up and caught her tears with a finger, effectively wiping them away. "I can't imagine anyone being effective at comforting others if they themselves refuse such a thing when they need it the most. Taking comfort is not a sign of weakness, little one. It's a sign of being alive."

He places a light kiss at the top of her head. "No one is asking you to be perfect. Especially not here in Avalon. In fact, I think imperfections are what makes someone beautiful. It gives them a very endearing quality."

So so totes late!

[song_princess]

It felt a little surreal, to see a finger that isn't her own catching her tears and also being comforted like this. "Then you have never met a Heron before, at least none before me." A small sigh. "While it is true, Mitsuhide... This one... This one cannot be selfish and ask of such things."

The kiss on the top of her head and she couldn't help but to let more tears fall. Why was he breaking through her defenses so easily?!

"But... I have to be... I am not allowed... Their deaths. Why am I the only one?"

[damn_kitsune]

"You are not being selfish if there is one here who is willing to give comfort to you without being asked." Though he wasn't sure what to think about the Heron culture if it caused Leanne to tear herself down so much. It reminded him of some of the Buddist sects that were again Nobunaga.

"I cannot answer to why you are the only one. I just know that they saved you simply because they loved you. For them, you need to learn to love yourself as well."

[song_princess]

She shouldn't accept this comfort. She doesn't deserve such comforts. "But... It is still...." She was losing the willpower to keep the argument up. Numb, her whole being feels numb due to letting nearly everything out. Heron culture was the best culture, she is just trying to overdo it due to guilt.

"But... I don't deserve such a sacrifice or great act of love...."